Whats for Breakfast?

Breakfast of Champions at Lodging House Mission
Nutritional facts: Scotland culture
Fat: no comment
Carbohydrates: the plastic tray
Sugar: two scoops in the tea
Tomato: microwave so that the seeds start to bubble
Egg: over easy, maybe too easy
Tottiescone: under the egg, it is a potato deep-fried maybe the best part
Spam: deep-fried, do I need to say anything else
Black pudding: oatmeal, lard, and wait for it . . . wait for it . . .sheep blood.
Refried beans: kind of rubbery with a Jell-O consistency
Ham: fried in the stomach musical grease
Knife: doesn't really need to be used
Spoon: plastic so that the junkies don't cook up in the bathroom, seriously
Fork: doubles as a spoon, fork and knife
Bread: more butter than white bleached flour bread
Tea: strong